UT: Grandpa Seaver's Funeral

Obituary

An amazing man completed his journey and passed through the veil on June 14, 2015, surrounded by his sweetheart of 64 years and lots of family. James Vernon Seaver, the youngest of five children, was born, in Webb, AZ in 1934. At the age of 17, he married cute little 16-year old Betty Loyce Burton. They both joked how they married young and raised each other into perfect spouses. They truly became one. 

Dad had a tender heart. He was always hugging and kissing Mom, and saying, “Have I told you kids lately how much I love your mom?” In his final days, he reminded his family to care for his sweet Betty when he was gone. 

He had many jobs throughout his life, and he was good at all of them. He loved learning how and why things worked. He spent many years in Etna, California as a dairyman, rancher and farmer, while he and Betty raised their six children. For the last 27 years, he lived in Utah. He had many jobs and hobbies including welder, electrician, organist, airplane pilot, ham radio operator (K6GZV), and Dairy Customer Service Representative at DHI Computing Service. 

Vernon held numerous callings within the LDS church, most notably 15 years in the bishopric and many years as a stake high councilor, spreading his love, humor and faith throughout the Stake. He also loved and served his neighbors. He frequently brought home extra people for dinner, and Betty happily fed them. 

Dad had a legendary sense of humor. Even in some of his last moments, he told jokes and made us laugh. Some of his most memorable sayings were, “It’ll feel better when it quits hurtin’.” “Will this affect your eternal salvation?” and “Betty, what do I want to wear today?” 

He taught his family the value of working hard, loving deeply, and living faithfully. His love for his sweetheart and his faith in the Savior Jesus Christ were both solid as a rock, and those principles of devotion to family and faith shaped the generations that follow him. When he realized he would soon leave this life, he gave us good words to live by when he said, “I don’t owe anybody anything, and I don’t have anything to repent of.” Though our hearts are aching, we are also full of joy at having known and loved our husband, dad, and grandpa. 

Vernon is survived by his beloved wife, Betty Loyce Seaver, and his six children: Orland (Meredith), Candace (Jim) Ivie, Lar (Mary), Shari (Ben) LaFleur, Carl (Karry), and Rebecca (Kevin) Chase, 31 grandchildren and 50 great grandchildren. He was preceded in death by his parents and siblings, parents-in-law, and a granddaughter. 

Funeral services will be held Friday, June 19 at 11:00 am at the Lehi East Stake Center, corner of 900 N and 1200 East, Lehi, UT. Viewings will be Thursday night 6-8 pm at Sundberg Olpin Mortuary, 495 South State Street, Orem, UT and Friday morning 10-10:45 am at the church. Burial will be in Orem City Cemetery.

The funeral was beautiful.  The speakers did such a wonderful job of honoring Grandpa's life and sharing the gospel.  I loved reading the transcript and really I could have shared so many wonderful stories and quotes.  If you ever want to get to know our Grandpa, you should read it too (here).  Here are just a few quotes that I enjoyed:

Aunt Candace: "His love and knowledge of computers, electronics, physics, engineering, economics, farming, ranching, flying, religion, and music is the seed of most of the hobbies and careers of everyone in our family." 

Cousin Carl: "This was our grandpa, a great man of service, love and comedy.... 'What's the difference between a good haircut and a bad haircut?  Two weeks!'  He used to say, 'I've learned two things in life, number one, don't worry about the little things; and number two, everything is a little thing.'" 

My Dad: "Our father taught us many lessons.  He taught us three basic principles to a happy life.  They are: to learn, to work, and to care." ... "So now, what about us going forward?  Take a moment and look at the relationship that we have with those three great lessons that Dad taught us.  We can do a little better, if not for ourselves but for those around us.  Dad's lessons are really just the gospel in action.  He not only believed it, but he lived it every day.  As we close the casket on Dad, Dad has on his finger his wedding ring, which represents nearly sixty-four years of marriage to our lovely mother and the posterity which he loved so much.  He also has a current temple recommend in his pocket, which represents those values which he and Mom built their faith and their lives on."  

Uncle Orland: "He taught great gospel principles.  You would be all sweaty and dirty, and you would have some bearing and all the pieces were falling out, and there would be grease everywhere, and he'd say, 'Well, there's a great gospel principle there,' and he would go ahead and start teaching the gospel of Jesus Christ while you're laying underneath a windrower.  I was grateful for that."

For the funeral we had two musical numbers.  The first was "Families Can Be Together Forever".  We invited all the family members who wanted to join us to come up to the stage and sing.  It was powerful to hear so many people singing to our Grandma that we will all be together forever.  (James stood by the piano so he could signal between me and my cousin Emily who was conducting since we were separated by lots of kids).

The second musical number was this song: What is This Thing Man Calls Death?  My cousin Liz sang a solo for the first verse.  She sings like an angel!  Then she was joined by a few more family members: Emily, Kelsey, Adam, & James.  It was gorgeous!!!  I was so nervous to learn a new song and play it for people within a few days.  As I played through it I was relieved to find out it wasn't too difficult.  I was talking to Jamie Bingham about it and she pointed out that maybe Janice Kapp Perry made it easy to play cause people would have to learn it last minute for funerals.  I think she was right.  Even though the chords were easy the music is beautiful and my family sang it soooo melodiously!  It brought chills!  

Grandpa wanted to be buried in a "simple pine box" this was the compromise.  

Jami had this conversation with Scarlett:
Scarlett: "Grandpa Seaver is where he belongs, he's in heaven."
Aunt Jami: "What else is in heaven?"
Scarlett: "Spiders."

Heaven sounds different than I imagined!

Then she had this conversation with my Aunt:
Aunt Shari: "Scarlett, you are so beautiful."
Scarlett: "You're welcome."

haha!  and she's so humble too!!!

The girls were all so tired from getting in late on the plane, sleeping somewhere new, adjusting to a different time zone, getting up early for the funeral, and going straight to the cemetery.  On the way to the family luncheon we fed them applesauce squeezies.  Siena was so tired that she fell asleep like this (see Scarlett taking a "photo" of her too!)

I helped my Grandma compile information from the funeral into a book of remembrance.  We had a fun afternoon together.  It was nice to chat and look at old photos with her.  (Can you tell where I got my green eyes from?)

She told me that she titled the book "Going Home."  I called her one day and asked her a bunch of sneaky questions to find out what kind of plane my Grandpa owned.  It was a late 1940s Piper Family Cruiser with canvas covering (instead of sheet metal), white with a red stripe, and a stick to fly it.  He actually owned it before they were married!  They both knew how to fly it and they were part of search and rescue teams.  After our phone call I did my best to find a photo of a plane fitting that description and I used it to make this cover for her book.  I showed it to my Dad and my Grandma at different times and they both said to me: "that looks like a pretty aggressive angle of attack!"  haha!  Like mother, like son!

My cousin, Jeremiah, has been scanning in old family photos and documents.  I'm so grateful for the countless hours of work that he's doing to capture our family history.  Here are a few from my Grandpa's life.  Can you tell who that little boy is in the shopping cart seat?  Is it James?  No!  It's my dad!

I love these photos of my Grandparents!  I love that my Grandma is sitting on the table with her skirt all carefully spread out.  I can totally see me doing that!

Look how cute they are!  My grandpa has been into ham radios for as long as I can remember (and probably way before that too!)  His call sign was K6GZV.  K-6-George-Zanzibar-Victor.  I remember sitting in his basement office listening to the crackling radio sounds as he spoke to some ham radio acquaintance (all while I was spinning in circles in his office chair or pulling the perforated edges off the continuous-feed computer paper).

Never stopped working!  

Just the other day - weeks after the funeral - Scarlett was in my bedroom (back in MI) and she got her finger smashed in the hinge side of the door.  I heard her screaming (the real pain scream that makes your stomach fall) and I ran into the bedroom.  Her pointer finger on her left hand had a huge crease where the edge of the door pressed into her skin.  It was purple and red and immediately started swelling up.  She was screaming "this is the worst owie ever!"  From what I could tell it wasn't broken, just injured badly, so I carried her to the living room and started doctoring her: ice packs, ibuprofen, TV shows, blanket nest, lots of pillows, and (of course) treats.  While I was adjusting her pillows she started this conversation:
Scarlett: "What if you get hurt mom?"
Me: "I'm very careful.  But Dad will take care of me if I do get hurt."
Scarlett: "But what if you get dead?"
Me: "I will be careful and Heavenly Father will help protect us."
Scarlett: "But Grumple's Dad is dead."
Me: *surprised since she hasn't spoken about the funeral in several weeks* "Yes, but he was very old.  Am I very old?"
Scarlett: *smiling* "No."
Me: "That's right.  I am going to live a long time."
Scarlett: "You'll be alive for a really really really really really long time?"
Me: "That's right."

Now I know that technically I can't make those promises to her, but she's 4 and doesn't need anything else to worry about (she's already afraid of shadows, slivers, loud noises at night, and me brushing her hair after taking a bath).  Mostly I was surprised that she brought this up.  I have had a few talks with her this summer about eternal families and heaven.  One time she even asked me out of the blue "when I'm a mom, do I get to go up to heaven to get my baby?"  haha!  These little conversations are honest inquiries that we all face in our earth life.  We all want to have that reassurance that we can be with our families forever.  Even though heaven is this abstract idea (with babies, Grandpa, and spiders) Scarlett still grasps the concept.  Because it is truth.  And truth resonates in our hearts no matter what age we may be.

My Grandma gave me a copy of an old Relief Society lesson from 1977.  It discusses how to teach your children about death.  She and Grandpa decided that they would make a copy for every grandchild because this concept is so important.  And in these tender times our hearts become the most teachable.  I looked over the paper then tucked it away thinking that my kids were still too small, but after Scarlett's questions the other day I have changed my mind.  I scanned it in, just in case anyone else would like to refer to it.  She also gave me a copy of a Deseret News article that you can find here.

I'm grateful for the man that my Grandpa was.  I'm grateful for the lessons he taught us and how he lived his life.  And I'm grateful that we all have the opportunity to live with our families for eternity.