The Trombone Trio

So over the course of our friendship, Laura and I learned that we shared a common hidden talent: playing the trombone. We both played in it Junior high, we both used our dad's old trombones at one point, and both our dad's had bright orange vintage trombone cases. Laura also learned that another one of our friends, Joanne, played the trombone in high school as well. We thought it was funny that these three improbable gals played such a masculine instrument. A bit of useless trivia that would hopefully stay in the past....

Well, our Ward Christmas party was coming up and they announced that they wanted to have a mini-talent show featuring all sorts of Christmas performances after our big holiday dinner. Laura texted me and said it would be fun if we played a little trombone trio that night. Mind you this was TEN DAYS before the dinner, neither one of us had access to a trombone, and we hadn't played in over 15 years!!! I thought it might be fun, but really unlikely that it would ever come together - so there was no harm in going along with the idea. Jake on the other hand loved the idea! He was all on board. I think deep down he wanted to see me sweat, cause I don't easily get embarrassed. haha! I mentioned our plan to one of the RS presidency (Janice), and honestly I thought she would tell me that it was too loud for the night. Then she would be the "bad" guy and I wouldn't have to perform. She LOVED the idea!? I totally forgot that her son is in marching band and she is a huge supporter of his music. Plus she just thought it would be fun to see the 3 of us perform.

Snap. Well, we still didn't have instruments. The Sunday before our party - 7 days to go - Janice announced in RS that there might be a surprise trombone performance by some of our sisters!? haha! Oh man, this was starting to get out of control! One of the sisters in our ward heard her announcement and offered her husband's old trombone if we needed one. That, plus Joanne's spare, we were set with our instruments. Finally on Wednesday - 4 days to go - I finally got my hands on a trombone. It was so weird opening it up. The memories came flooding back. The little slide oil, the spit valve, even the smell of the metal, it was all so familiar! It brought back memories of my Jazz band quartet performances, practices in the band room, all the nasty spit, and lugging around that huge case a over a mile to school every day.

It even reminded me of a very embarrassing moment to little 7th grade Jenni.... Our band teacher, Mr. Winters, started learning to play music on the trombone. So he loved the instrument. We had a special practice just for trombones before school one day (I think they did this with all the instruments). But it was basically all the 7th grade trombonists in one room. Just me and a dozen 12-13 year old boys. Mr. Winters was in his office getting some papers and we were all just goofing around waiting for him. I remember feeling so awkward and wanting to be "cool" around the boys. I don't know what led up to me saying this, but I remember saying: "look at us - we are just a bunch of boners!" Now, mind you, I was a twelve year old girl with no older brothers and a very innocent outlook on life. I had no idea that word meant anything besides, in my head, someone who plays the trombone. But I knew I said something embarrassing by the reaction of the boys. I remember feeling bright red and flustered - especially cause I didn't know what I did wrong. But looking back, those boys were so kind to me. Yes they snickered, but I don't remember them teasing me or ever bringing it up again. I also remember going home and telling my mom what happened. I was MORTIFIED when I discovered what a blunder I had made! (probably equally as bad as the time I went to this anti-tobacco youth conference in Park City and they made us make up rhymes to introduce ourselves and I said "My name is Jenni Seaver and I am not a beaver!" having no idea that it was a crude slang word - those kids were not as kind as my junior high guy friends).

Back to the story - so I assembled the trombone and started practicing. I think the sheer volume of the instrument combine with it's weird design was just too much for the twirls. They started crying every time I practiced. I only really got to practice 3 times before our performance and one of those times was with the trio. As things kept falling into place for our performance I would think over and over "I can't believe this is coming together!" When I agreed to this I honestly thought it would never happen!

The night of the performance came and I couldn't believe how nervous I was. I think I just felt so unprepared. But the main point was to have fun and surprise everyone with our secret hidden talent. We weren't hoping for perfection, just for entertainment. Next to the stage they had the line up. I bought these light up tree necklaces for the girls, they were loving them!

The trio met in the nursery room to warm up together. We planned to play Jingle Bells through one time, wait 4 beats while our kids ran on the stage, then play it again while the girls jingled some bells and we added a few "embellishments."

Well half way through, the girls were nervous, the crowd thought we were done and started clapping, and it was just a little chaotic, so I ended up playing after 4 beats, but no one else did. *awkward* But we were able to start up together and finish strong. Scarlett was wearing this sequin hat that has little bells sewn on the side of it. She wouldn't hold a bell, instead she decided to just shake her head like crazy to jingle the bells on her hat! haha!

Here's the video evidence for your viewing pleasure for some holiday entertainment for a good laugh: (and yes, I'm the loudest one. Don't ask me how this severe asthmatic accomplished that. But I never had a problem playing loudly in school. I'm just a loud person. Even my normal talking voice is loud. Loud loud loud. Loud.)

I'm grateful that Laura gently encouraged me to do this. :-) It was a fun experience and something I never thought I would do. Afterward several people came up to us and said how shocked they were when we all walked on stage. We were the last people they would guess played the trombone! I doubt that I'll keep practicing, well, at least not til next year's Ward Christmas party!

Now I want to vent about something that happened that same day. Hours before the Christmas party, I went to Kohl's to buy a gift for the giving tree that night. The checkout line was long so I went and stood at the end. These two women - maybe late 20s - and their mom and boyfriend came in line behind me. I wasn't paying much attention to them, but after a few min I realized they were talking about me. They were talking loud enough so that I could hear, cause the wanted me to. They were saying mean things about my hair, my face, and my overall appearance. At first I was just so shocked that they were being so mean and I had literally done nothing to them, in fact I wasn't even facing them. So many things went through my head during the next 10 minutes of standing in line. I heard my mom's voice telling me that girls are mean when they are jealous (I felt like I looked pretty cute that day and they were wearing sweats without makeup). I could hear my dad's voice telling me that some people are just broken and they don't know how to be kind. I remembered all the times that I said something snotty as a teenager in front of my mom and she made me apologize. I remembered when my dad taught me that other's people happiness/beauty/talents/success doesn't diminish my own - that we can be truly happy for someone and it doesn't take away from our own joy. I remembered all growing up if we would tell my mom "I really like her hair" she would say "go tell her that!" and how as grown ups we often hear the negative things, but we rarely hear the positive things - that we should share those warm fuzzies with others.

Then my mind shifted, I went away from trying to understand them to how I was going to demolish them. I thought about how I was going to comment on their appearance. Or say something to their boyfriend like "how do you date such a biotch?" I wanted to ask them if this was junior high, or if they were actually adults just acting like kids. I thought of looking their mom straight in the eye and saying, "wow if my girls were to ever talk like that in front of me I would turn them over my knee and give them a good spanking." I thought that I could start asking how they contribute to society and make them feel insignificant for not adding value to our world but just sucking it away. I thought about laying on the Christmas guilt, talking about religion. I thought how I could tell them I don't really take much stock in criticism from people that reek of stale cigarette smoke. I thought of looking them up and down and then saying (in a condescending way) how I was fine that they thought that, then turning around. I thought about just turning around and saying super nice things to them and being really sweet.

I used to think it was a talent of mine that I could think of comebacks in the heat of the moment - but I now realize that while yes, sometimes that has its place, that's not the person I want to be. I try so hard to spread joy. I try to ask meaningful questions, and really listen. I like to smile at everyone. I pray to find ways to do little acts of service through my day. I often say the words "What Would Jesus Do?" in my head. In that moment, in the checkout line at Kohl's, I couldn't think of a single phrase I could say to those girls that would make a difference in their lives and make me proud of myself. So I chose to "turn the other cheek." I just pretended that I didn't hear them and smiled when I saw them looking at me. I don't always make the right choice, but I felt like in that moment I did. Then why did I fell so awful?! I already feel like a huge pregnant whale, my skin is out of control, none of my clothes fit right, and my self-esteem is just not where it usually is... so these comments really seemed to hit me hard. I didn't think they did, but their words were in the back of my mind all weekend.

The next day, Sunday, we had a special combine RS lesson 3rd hour and they invited all the women from the other auxiliaries to join. (Jake ended up subbing in nursery) The lesson was centered around Visiting Teaching and "The errand of angels is given to women." At the beginning of the meeting they told the sisters that they will be using a new google form to do the reporting every month (my idea that I made for them) so the RS President thanked me. I was feeling a bit all over the place. I played the piano in Sacrament meeting last week, the trombone the night before, now this. I don't know sometimes I just feel like I'm too hyper. GSD! After the lesson on VTing they had 2 different sisters come share their personal experiences with the blessings of the VTing program. The second sister the share was my friend Sara. She told how she's always liked the VTing program, but due to her health and crazy grad school schedule she hadn't seen her VTers in many years. Well she had a very difficult pregnancy this past year. She met with her medical team to discuss all her options. They told her there was a chance that she would need to go on medical bed rest for several months. They asked if she had a support network to help her and before she had a chance to reply her midwife (who's worked with several members of the church) piped up and said "oh don't worry, her church takes very good care of it's members!" haha!

On her way home that day Sara called her mom to tell her that funny story. Her mom immediately asked her "who are your visiting teachers?" Sara admitted that she didn't know and her mom told her she needed "Proactive VTers." Her mom gave Sara one week to call the RS before she was going to call them herself. Sara mentioned how she felt silly asking for new VTers, but she knew her mom meant business so she better call. She called the presidency and told them a little bit of the story and mentioned she might need new VTers. They told her that they actually assigned her new VTers two days ago! (the Lord is so mindful of us) and that her new VTers were Julianna and Jenni (me). Sara then said "And if you know these two, they embody the word proactive." :-) GSD! She went on to say some lovely things about the VTing program and the some of our experiences together.

All weekend I had been thinking about those awful comments from Kohl's but in that moment at church I knew that Heavenly Father loved me. It was like her words were His way of helping me realize the things in my life that really matter. I felt so peaceful and loved. Since that meeting I can think back to my experience at Kohl's and it doesn't turn my stomach like it did before. Sara's words were so kind and I really felt the comforting influence of the Holy Ghost. I know that our Heavenly Father loves each one of us and if we pay attention, He sends His angels to help lift us up. I hope that I can follow promptings and be that angel for others, but I am thankful for all you, my friends and family, who heed those promptings and reach out to serve me and my family. xoxo!!!